MOVING on with life after the death of a loved one is never easy but for those who are bereaved by suicide, the journey to recovery is often filled with more hurdles.
Although mental illness and suicide are slowly becoming an open topic of discussion, the stigma remains and unfortunately many people struggle for years to make peace with the passing of someone due to suicide.
Hoping to provide much-needed support for people in this situation, Lifeline South East is offering a bereaved by suicide support group.
Helen Jurd has helped to facilitate these sessions for a number of years and said given the amount of suicides that have occurred, people need a place where they can openly share their thoughts.
“By being part of a conversation people are going to feel less isolated – the more we talk about it, the less stigma there will be,” she said.
“If they know they will be accepted and they won’t be judged then they are more likely to reach out for help.”
Bereaved by suicide herself, Ms Jurd understands the pain others may go through and the benefits of talking to someone in a similar situation.
“I have lost two people to suicide and I think it helps me to be able to relate to what they are going through – you have an instant connection,” she said.
“Grief is not based on how long it has been since the person has passed, there is no time limit, wherever someone is at is where they are meant to be.”
Ms Jurd said the stigma around suicide often leads to a lack of communication which delays the healing process.
“It can be a very unreal experience to have to adapt to no longer having their loved ones presence with them in the physical,” she said.
“But when the bereaved person does the work of mourning it is possible they may recapture a new sense of meaning and peace within their lives.
“If a person feels ready it is possible that attending a support group may provide a valuable environment in which to move towards a sense of peace or at least feel the relief in they are not alone.”
After losing her daughter to suicide five years ago, a former Mount Gambier resident who wishes to remain anonymous, took the brave step and joined the support group.
Wanting to connect with others but worried what it would be like, the woman said she did feel quite defensive at first.
“I remember walking down the driveway to Lifeline and thinking ‘do I need to be here?”, she said.
“The first one meeting was pretty scary, but Helen led us through the session and was very welcoming and supportive.
“The main thing was that you didn’t have to explain yourself.”
Although tempted not to go back, the woman said she and her husband decided to complete all eight sessions.
“We were very comfortable there, the people in the group were the only ones you could truly be honest with,” she said.
“I couldn’t recommend it more highly.”
Now living interstate, she said they are searching for a similar support group in their new home town.
“The group is like a little refuge – it is the most personal, gentle and authentic out of all mental health services available,” she said.
“In those dark days give it a try, if it’s not for you, you don’t have to come back.”
The bereaved by suicide support group program consists of eight sessions – one a week – and it is recommended that at least three months have passed since the time of loss.
Contact Lifeline South East on 8723 2299 or at office@lifelinese.com.au for more information about the group.
If you or someone you know needs emotional support, contact Lifeline’s 24-hour crisis line on 131 114.
